Reader, I must tell you a secret. I have this disease called Jukeboxitis. No matter where I am, what time it is, or who is in the room, if I see a “jukebox” (are they still called that?), I can’t forget about it. As you can imagine, it’s very debilitating. To complicate matters, jello shots only worsen conditions. So last night, I was at Sangillo’s having a few casual jello shots for my friend’s birthday, and not two slightly Robitussin-flavored j-shots in did I find myself in a familiar situation: pinned up against the jukebox, fingers greedily scrolling through the song list, brain humming with the possibilities. After a tumultuous decision process, I finally chose a song. And for the sake of my street cred, I won’t tell you what it was.
Gotchya! I don’t have any street cred. It was “Too Close” by Next.
Anyway, so “Too Close” is gettin’ everyone all riled up and ready to go, as only a song about dance floor wood can, and I’m bustin’ out my most awkward moves. My buddy, the birthday boy, is also spastically jolt-dancing, and spots a blonde at the bar. She was pretty much the only other female in the bar aside from me, and lucky for him she wasn’t busted. Oops, I mean, lucky for him she had a great personality. Continuing on with the story, he asked her to dance. She answered “only if we can swing.”
I’m unsure if she meant like in the jump, jive, an’ wail sense, or the swanky parties of openly unfaithful spouses, but either way, it got me thinking about dancing. I’m really, really bad at it. Can’t move to save my life. Yet, perhaps as a side effect of JukeBoxitis, I can’t seem to contain these hips when the music gets going. And after this woman said “only if we can swing,” my body had the urge to do the jumpin’ joe. But where oh where could I do such a thing?
Well, thank heavens for the internet because via my amazing google search skills (“swing dance” “Portland, ME”), I found out exactly where I can get my swing on in Portland. Apparently, once a month, swingers (the dancing kind…) can head on down to Mayo Street Arts and hit the dance floor at “This Joint is Jumpin.” This month’s event is just around the corner, too: Saturday, July 14, with a lesson at 7pm, followed the dance from 8pm-11pm. It’s just $8 and they’ve got DJ PJ playin’ all your favorite jivin’ tunes.
For more info, click here.
And until next time, watch this.
Drop some knowledge.